Thursday, July 29, 2010
The Ugly
Unfortunitly my dad was right about when he said that the ugly is that families are ripped apart. If you are thinking about having a divorce, don't. It is an experience your children, if you have any, will never forget. Even if you divorce when your children are young they'll still ask you "why are you and dad separated?" or "how come we never see dad?" if you don't have kids...I'm sorry but I don't know way to say.
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Eli,
ReplyDeleteDivorce does rip a family apart. But a divorce is a vital option for ending very bad marriages. In homes where there is abuse, violence or other serious problems, the best way to protect members of the family, especially the children, may be to end those marriages.
Some children suffered throughout their lives living with parents who didn't get along and but stay married. So which is worst to live in - in a house with parents in a bad marriage or in two houses with two parents who aren't at each other's throat?
I think you are a good model for younger children of divorce parents who may be voiceless, don't get interviewed by Today's Show or Oprah but instead have someone like you they can ask what it was like. It's important you show the good, the bad and the ugly about divorce without being biased.
I think it's great that children of divorce parents have a voice such as you have in this blog. You give us adults an opportunity to look at divorce from the child’s point of view.
I also believe that children of divorce parents have their own culture - just like some deaf people have theirs. We both float between two worlds - you with mom and dad and me with the deaf and the hearing world.
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ReplyDeleteBulls-eye Eli! You hit that one square and center. There is far more "ugly" and "bad" in divorce than "good."
ReplyDeleteThe United States has the highest divorce rate in the world, Eli--no other country even comes close. I think this has to do with the American sense of individuality, the notion that the individual is more important than the society, that the individual is more important than the family unit as a whole.
Family is everything, Eli. Everything. Parents need to think of their children, and they need to act in a manner that is best for the family as a whole. Unfortunately a lot of parents seem to just think only of themselves and their own wants and perceived "needs." That's very selfish, and ultimately very destructive for everyone else in the family. With these divorces the kids pay the price.
Now Eli, we are all set to go fishing this Saturday. Your Aunt Dede is fine with it, but your Aunt Diana is not too crazy about the whole idea. I want to be very clear about something, Eli: there is to be no waving of fish heads or fish guts in Aunt Diana's face. OK? No fish heads or fish guts in Aunt Diana's face!
See you Friday, Eli. Love you!